There are always days that don't go as planned. Even the best of us have a day now and then when our carefully mapped out intentions go haywire or life throws a wrench or even a whole tool kit at us and laughs as we scramble to get back on track while ducking for cover.
I've decided to list all the things I didn't do today partly to show the crazy and unrealistic expectations I set for myself and also to lament what total crap today has been. It probably won't make me feel any better but at the very least I can check the "write a blog post" off the list of things I was going to accomplish while being a superhuman.
1. I did not make it to work by 4:30 AM.
The non-functioning alarm clock played its role in this. Luckily Andy happened to wake up and notice and I was only ten minutes late.
2. I did not finish my work project in a magical way where everything worked perfectly and I sailed through it with the ease of a seasoned professional.
By the time I was sure I would be ready to move on to the actual build of my project I was about halfway done prepping it. By the time I was ready to run it through the machine that solders it, I had already been sidetracked by finding the answers to several unforseen problems. By the time the boards started to go through I realized I would likely be in my late forties by the time I left the shop. By the time I started to rework the project, the person who was helping explain it to me had left for the day. By the time I figured out I didn't really understand half of what she had explained to me I was ready to give up. By the time I had reached my wit's end I had only finished six boards to the point I was hoping to accomplish. Out of 26. One of those was the example my co-worker made for me.
3. I did not leave work at 10 AM.
I left at 1:50 PM after I assuered Andy if he came to pick me up at 1:30 I'd be ready.
4. I did not say "it's not my problem" when I realized a fellow co-worker did something accidentally that could have major repercussions.
I fixed the problem. It wasn't my problem to fix and it took me an extra twenty minutes but I didn't really see a reason for someone else to have as fucked up a day as I had. It annoyed me in a huge way though and then, as a bonus made me feel bad about being so irritated.
5. I did not get what I ordered.
I had skipped lunch because I thought I was leaving work at 10, and after I got in the zone of screwing so many things up it was hard to get out of it. Andy took me to IHOP to get breakfast for lunch and my order was all goofy. I was happy that my pancakes didn't have any whipped cream, and my scrambled eggs were dry, but my anticipated extra crunchy hashbrowns looked as though they'd never kissed the skillet and the bacon and sausage link were oddly accompanied by ham. The kid who was waiting on us said he knew something was wrong and then brought me two more bacon strips and two more sausage strips which I tried to eat out of a weird obligatory need to please him.
6. I did not finish my breakfast.
Even so, I could barely move after three strips of bacon, two and a half sausage links, one and a half pancakes and some uncrispy hashbrowns. I really appreciated the effort on the eggs, but only managed two forkfulls. The manager tried to get me to take a box home but I was still unsure of my walking skills after being so stuffed so I declined. Which made me feel bad. This is an ongoing theme for today in case you hadn't noticed.
7. I did not buy Andy a Christmas present.
We ended up in a big argument at Home Depot instead. Because realizing your plan to gather more information about anything you might possibly surprise your husband with is an abject failure, just like your whole day to this point, is what Christmas is about.
8. I did not put up the outdoor decorations.
It was either pouring or drizzling throughout the day and it was bitter cold. I was also asleep.
9. I did not finish the indoor decorations.
We were going to be bringing the boxes down from the attic and actually trimming the tree that's up and putting up the village houses and all the other Christmas decor. I have been planning on doing this all week and it is the third Saturday in a row I haven't been able to accomplish it. See the "I was asleep" explanation above. Also see "today sucks".
10. We did not get to the theatre to see Mockingjay.
I would say "don't spoil the ending!" but it's not like I haven't read the books multiple times or that I don't realize this movie is only part one of two. I am interested to see how they dealt with Phillip Seymour Hoffman's death though, and I really was hoping to fit this in today although it might have been a teeny stretch.
12. I didn't get to elf you up.
My elf project will have to wait until I am a functional human being again. Right now, I just want to sleep even though I just had a long winter's nap. I may have also lost some of my excitement over it, realizing I am now incredibly behind on my project at work and I am going to be working a ton of extra hours next week trying to catch up which will leave me no time to properly elf your world. Since this is what I was terribly excited about the last few days I'm feeling pretty low about the fact that I'm once again sucking at the holidays. I don't know how people with children function at this time of year. I can't even please one person let alone a whole brood who would depend on me. Cue sad music that in some way defines my misery and doesn't completely aggravate my slowly building tension headache I've given myself after reading this list of impossible accomplishments I failed to achieve.
13. I did not write anything for number eleven.
I can't even make a proper list today. With that, I'm calling it a night. I certainly hope your best laid plans made Saturday all you hoped it could be. Here's also hoping Sunday is going to be a little merrier and a little more productive.